[Verse 1]
"Does anybody know how to put my microwave together?"
I yelled while wondering the dance floor,
In the middle of the night.
Then a hot lady appeared with a Jack and Coke filled with pills.
So of course I chugged the whole thing,
And washed it down with gasoline.

[Pre-Chorus 1]
What happened after that,
I really do not know.
They might have put too many ice cubes in my Jack and Coke.
And then I called a cab,
And drove it to my home.
I parked it in the bedroom,
We finally were alone.

[Chorus]
It was like a tornado in my bed.
All I saw was hair and flesh.
Just a spinning blurry mess.
And before I blacked out,
The lady took her wig off,
and said; "I'm from the future. You'll understand someday."

[Post-Chorus]
That was not a chick.
It was just me in a wig.
That was not a chick.
It was just me in a wig.

[Verse 2]
"I don't understand why I would travel back in time just to sleep with myself?"
I said to my accountant.
"I mean I'm sure there's a good reason for me to do what I'm going to do I guess but- I don't know."
"I don't know what else to really say about this."

[Pre-Chorus 2]
What happened after that,
I really do not know.
I might have had a Jack and rubbing alcohol and Coke.
I'm ready for the day,
It's time for me to be,
On the other end of that night,
I fixed my microwave.
I fixed my microwave.
I fixed my microwave.
Microwave.

[Chorus]
It was like a tornado in my bed.
All I saw was hair and flesh.
Just a spinning blurry mess.
And before I blacked out,
The lady took her wig off,
and said; "I'm from the future. You'll understand someday."