Lyrics to Modern Problems

Modern problems can't escape 'em

Modern problems won't go away

Modern problems with me always

Modern problems can't live without 'em



You'd better stay away from me

Or you'll get caught in my misery

Now I'm searching for a wife

To be depressed with for the rest of my life



Modern problems keep me this way

Modern problems nothing to say

Modern problems nothing to give

Modern problems impossible to live with!