Have I wasted my life?

I've spent six hundred and sixty-six days chasing phantoms
Only to find that the architects of my misfortune are not supernatural

What is the point of believing?
What is my reason for living?

All my life I've painted a castle in the sky
Forging an eternity that can only exist in my mind
Despite all my failures, I don't think I wasted my time

As I stare into the all-pervading firmaments
I face reality: I am not permanent

I swear I don't want to live in celestial paradise
Nor force others into a tyrant's egotistical paradigm
Tear me from the arms of this egoist that seeks to claim me
For this is not the carpenter that fashioned humility

Father, I know there's more to you
I hope there's more to you than this
I hope there's more to you than meets the mind